


Of Letters and Pills

by ravenousbee



Category: To The Moon (Video Game)
Genre: Death fic :P
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-22
Updated: 2018-02-22
Packaged: 2019-03-22 16:16:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13767819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ravenousbee/pseuds/ravenousbee
Summary: Basically, Neil Watts decides it's finally time to take a week off, call in sick, and rest at his lovely home. In the process, he decides to write a letter to Eva each day of the week, but of course, nothing ever goes as Neil plans.Simply: 5 letters from Neil to Eva and 1 letter from Eva to Neil





	Of Letters and Pills

**Author's Note:**

> Ahoy~ Almost done transferring fics from Fanfiction.net to here :')   
> Simply put, a collection of 5 letters from Neil to Eva and one from her to Neil.  
> The ones with scribbles on them were the ones Neil crossed out of the letter. You can read them, ~cause foreshadowing :P~ but Eva's unable to do so.  
> Please, enjoy!

_My dearest of traversal agents,_

_I wonder how you’re holding up. Today I paid a visit two our good old friends, Johnny and River. It was a long ride, and I can say for sure that visiting Lily, Sarah and ~~lizard~~ Tom was quite worth it. I also dropped by the graveyard to place some freshly picked hibiscus on Colin’s grave.   
I **was**_ _about to greet Nora as well, but I got a call from my doctor’s manager, saying that I had an appointment. So unfortunately couldn’t pay my debts to her precious soul. Maybe for another day.  
I’ll be calling in sick for a while. Made sure to break that to dearest Bob myself, so that would save you the trouble. And to make sure you wouldn’t feel **lonely** while I’m not there, I’ve decided to create this collection of letters for each and every day I’m not there.   
You know, gotta leave you something to have you on your toes!  
Please make sure that ~~that maniac~~ Roxanne doesn’t enter my office ~~. I don’t want her poki~~ Bait her with ice-cream to your own office. Or even better! ~~Bobert’s~~~ Robert’s~! Maybe they finally make out over some melting vanilla ice-cream.   
Please, just leave my poor office alone. My **you rock!** poster needs some time alone to cope with my absence.  
I would appreciate it if you let Robert take care of my stuff in the office. He’ll drop a few things I can’t live without by my house. Please don’t try to distract him, **I have given him a few restricting orders, gotta make sure he can concentrate!  
** Perhaps when I arrive back at work, I’ll ------___---___--_-_  
Wow, remind me never to write with my pen again. A slip and the paper’s ruined.  
As I was ~~mentioning~~ dictating my rules, when I arrive back at work, I’ll be expecting a party. With my face, on billboards, outside in the **face**_ _of the protestors. I don’t care how many tomatoes they’ll throw by. My face will still look majestic with these mirrors on my eyes. Gives it a… reflective vibe._  
                                                                                                                             ^I tried to create a pun, dumplings.

 _I want music, chanting my name, and of course, I do_ **not** want to see any rosalene-brand carrot cake, not today, you evil spirit!  
My hands hurt from writing too much. Meh. Not **that** much, I can code, like, what, 30x this shit. (<cucumber>).   
So yeah. ~~See you later~~  
Write   
Hopefu  
Au revoir ( not literally )  
                       (^but also yes), gardener.  
~Dr.Lorenzo Von Matterhorn­­  


_My cactus-sexual friend,_

_I was feeding my Nintendo pet when I realized your love life is as active as my pet.  
Not active. My digital pet doesn’t even move, nowadays.  
See, you’re on my mind whenever. I could see a can of aloe Vera and make it link into your personality.  
~~Not to mention every time I see a marine documentation, I remember your strange obsession over jellyfishes  
The do  
~~ Guess who dropped by today! Bob! I’m too tired to go and correct that, I think your IQ is high enough to tell you that’s Bob. Rob. Dagnabbit.   
He brought my stuff. Surprisingly, he brought the **You rock!**_ _poster along. I guess the poster looked depressed enough for him to bring it.  
I commenced a powerful, **hot** fever today. I mean, you can’t expect a super-model like me to be at the normal human body temperature all the time. Gotta get rid of that heat in ways other than sitting there and looking pretty.  
It’s kind of depressing how I’m just writing these letters and stacking them up to give them to you whichever day I come back to work, but my soul shall not falter with such words.  
~~To be honest, I’m counting down the days until I can finally get to grab that stupid Americano along my way back to home with you~~  
How’s ~~the crazy lass~~ Traci doing? Still busy hating me and taking away plushies from that ~~demon~~ beautiful angel?   
The day I give these letters to you, ohhh you’re so gonna have to reply to each and every **one**_ _of them! No wonder how many they may be. But you’re obligated to have a decent reply, consisted of at least 500 words! For each letter! I repeat!  
I had this crazy dream last night that we had guns and resources, and guess where we were. The SigCorp **moon base.** I think the ~~painki~~  acetaminophen kicked in. You had a literal eye patch. Kinda looked ~~ho~~  badass. Definitely more badass that an Eva holding a cactus.  
There were zombievas coming from every direction. I also found out River and Johnny didn’t have their long-awaited honey **moon**. (_ _ßsee?) They almost got bit. If it wasn’t for our weaponries, they would’ve been eating by one your precious mind’s offsprings._  
 I woke up in cold sweat dude. This zombie shit ain’t no good for me.   
~~I thought I saw Faye  
~~ I would’ve told you to come drop by, but there’s already too much bacteria in this house.  
^That came off wrong. I was **not** comparing you to a bacteria. You know that right? I’m just taking care of your physical health—Gah, nevemind an explanation.   
I started coding a game for dearest Colin. I almost threw in a lighthouse but, uh, gladly my body stopped his almighty by ~~passing out~~ deleting the files.   
I hope you’re not getting paired up with Alistair. I swear to god, I’ll buy you ~~one~~  half a kilograms of dark chocolate if that is happening right now, while I’m chilling on my sofa with my favorite noodle brand.  
Welp, this may be the end of the second letter.  
My phone’s off. I supposed you may be calling or texting me, seeing as you care **so much about me** , but I just figured I’d leave electromagnetic stuff away from me. Except for my laptop.  
Adios, ~~Medusa~~   
Mr.do I have to sign these every time?  
  


_Dr. Eva Rosalene,_

_I’m truly running out of words to write your name with. Meh.  
I wonder how you’re doing. Going towards your office, **cautiously** entering the place because maybe I’m back and already have placed a biiiiiiiiig bucket of water against your office door.  
Don’t you worry yourself about this poor soul.   
I mean you probably aren’t worried, just pissed off at how I left all paperwork for you!  
Last night ~~I had a nightm~~ I woke up to the sound of a crash, and guess what. A goddamn pigeon had attacked my window. Can you believe that??   
Roxanne has been spamming all of my emails. **All** of them.  
Of course I ignored her, a technician specialist needs to spend his time doing more important tasks.  
~~Although,~~ ~~Robert dropped by~~ ~~again  
 I truly regret giving him my address  
I w  
~~ Eh, I’m running out of words to write now. What even happens in my life nowadays?   
My fever’s back at it again. It’s struggling to be as hot as me, but sad how this fella fails every time.  
And I’ve got this **killer** headache. I don’t know when a serial killer entered my brain, but I’m almost tempted to call 911.  
My bonsai tree’s as strong as ever. I don’t even know why you forced me to buy it, but let me tell you, right now I really appreciate its existence. Another breathing creatures under the same roof as me? Yes, please ~~! I’m not feeling that alone with it next to my bedsi  
~~ I’m coffee deprived, dudette. Seriously. I can’t have any, but at the moment. Apparently it causes too much brain activity, **~~the doctor said my body might no~~**_ _I would be a hazard to all humanity, sweetheart. You don’t want to be **alive** when that happens, hah!  
Have this statement unheard and unseen, but I actually miss my job. I don’t know, there’s like a void in my routine life, you know? No more calling Robert Bob, no more baiting Roxanne with ice cream, no more ~~hearing your soothing vo~~ pouring water buckets on your head, and of course; no more hearing you worship your plants.  
How’re your eggplants doing? Or was it tomatoes?   
My hands are too tired to keep writing. I’ll leave the rest for your 4 th day without senior Vladmir.  
                                                                                                                                                                 (^me, of course)   
‘Till another day, ‘till another letter, dumplings’. I shall leave this majestic handwriting behind for you.  
Gotta go prepare for ~~my next appointment~~ for my next ketchup ritual. Need me some good ol’ tomatoes, ya know it!  
From sincerely yours to ~~sincerely not mine~~_ _the human obsessed with her garden, and the woman with a mind of a 80 years old grandmother,_  
Dr. Frankenstein 

 

 

_Rosiest of Rosalenes,_

_~~It is I, Neil Watts, the king of seven realms~~ _

_Well, that scribble sounded better in my head._  
How are you doing, my dear Eve? Personally, my fever has gone up a few degrees, and everything’s looking grim, to be honest. My vision’s blurry even with glasses on, and I’m having trouble breathing through my nose **or** my mouth. It’s most likely ~~a side effect of my medica~~ just a case of bad flu, but meh, I’d just rather stay in bed and watch my son, my precious bonsai grow hour by hour.   
Even though, a pathetic Flu can’t keep me from being **Neil goddamn Watts** , and I am proud to state I have successfully created a game about our most preciousest of patients, Nora.   
Figured just letting go of her like that when I made a full game about the contamination of Zombievas, just isn’t fair.  
Might start to work on something for the good ol’ Faye and Colin. But right now I’m already worn out from sitting by the computer for infinite hours writing that majestic code, so I’d rather rest.  
~~There are a few details I may discuss with you, and~~ -__----_-_  
I’ll be coming to the office tomorrow, hopefully, but unfortunately I won’t be able to speak with any of you.  
That could be explained by the fact that I’m gonna come around 4am and leave before 8.  
I’ll be picking a few stuff from my office, leaving the poor boy completely naked for a new Technician Specialist. ~~Truth is I’m~~  
I’ve talked out a few details with the boss about this break I’m taking from the job, and he decided it was for the best if they gave my office to one of the rookies from the other department for a while, for him to learn the **‘ropes of the job’** , he mentioned.   
Don’t get all too attached and friendly with that dude though, I’m having my eyes on you, Madame Rosalene. No one can ignore the majesty of Dr. Watts.  
That’s all for now. Make sure to mention in the reply of this letter how the new dude is. Gotta make sure my replacement was as cool as me when he’s gone.  
Have you come out to Traci about your sexuality yet? I’m sure she’ll accept the cactus phase, with open arms! That ~~brat~~ Jamie is going to be super excited to find another weirdo like himself.  
To the day I come back and kick the rookie out,  
Dr. Watts

_Eva,_

_This may perhaps be counted as the last letter I’ll write to you. My little ride of writing letters ended, well, way sooner than expected. 5 days in and we’re already done. Talk about luck, huh?  
Unfortunately I’m not going to be talking about how I’ve passed yesterday after writing the previous letter. There are a few matters that, shamefully I have to discuss with you.  
Now, my precious plant-lover, let’s commence with the easier parts.   
I’m coming out of the Sigmund Corporation. My illness, which I will elaborate on, be patient with me, is forbidding me of working, most specifically using the memory-editor again. Therefore I guess you’re going to celebrate the riddance of such annoyance and the entrance of an actual serious guy, dudette.  
Second thing to get off this vast list… is my illness.  
You probably never figured it out, only had your suspicions but second year into this job with you I started working on a new machine. Something far more capable of whatever we own right now, something to test on **hopeful living**_ _patients, rather than only ones who are hours from death.  
Thus I created an exact copy of our current machine using a few spare parts and a few sparkles from the maintenance department. My lack of promotion actually helped me somewhere, huh?  
My machine was, and rather is able to … alter memories. Not in the way our current one does. It can cut off a few memories and remove a few accidents, for the sake of a patient’s mental state. I was rather quite successful with the process until I realized my creation had some side effects.  
Now don’t get me wrong, it works **perfectly**_ _fine, but since it’s still a prototype and I was a one-band man working on it, it… seemed to have an extra effect on my brain. Initiate severe brain damage, but one I could live with and only experience pain; which resulted in me utilizing painkillers.  
Now, you probably know the rest. I use them way more that I should be, and addiction induces.   
Believe me, this is quite painful for me to write out. ~~I’m almost expecting the paper to be get wet with my tears.  
~~ Roxanne and Robert know mostly all about the machine. Whatever else that you might need in order to satisfy your curiosity with remains in my computer. A few codes here and there, ask Roxanne to help you decipher it. It’s a whole other language in there.  
There’s… a copy of Faye in the machine. I made a save of the algorithm during Colin’s case, I’m sure you can understand the potential objectives that Faye’s source code can grant us.   
Hah, I sound like an actual mad scientist now. Believe me, I’m not going to be one of those with grey hair sticking out of either side. That will be unattractive for the Neil Watts.  
Testing the machine on myself cause Faye’s ‘algorithm’ to enter my mind. Even though it was an accident, I decided to get the most out of this little mistake, which kind of backfired.  
My mind currently is a mix of Colin’s memories and those which were originally mine. I hope that in neither of those letters I’ve slipped a hint that I may be reciting Colin’s life.  
I’ve also been experiencing hallucination, which was the main reason I asked for some time off of SigCorp. There was no flu. It was just seeing Faye in every corner of the department and on every seat in my house, and I thought that perhaps it was time for some rest.  
Had a doctor appointment, the very first day. Things… aren’t looking good.  
The brain damage is lethal, and my addiction itself is causing my body’s systems to go berserk.   
I was supposed to be resting my days to the end, but after my second appointment today, I’m going to be hospitalized for a while. Most likely in an induced comatose. The doctor did not speak at all about any sort of treatment, but mentioned he had a few ideas in mind.  
Well! My hand certainly hurts from writing all that shameful bullshit, huh.  
Now, for the fun parts!  
I mean, nothing can be quite as fun now, can it? But I figured if I’m going to die in a few, I may as well come clean about a few things.  
  
Well, I’ve currently spent 10 minutes and 52 seconds staring at this very blank page, figuring out a way to tell you what I need to.  
Eva Rosalene, I am quite ashamed to admit that during the centuries of friendship that we’ve shared, I’ve come to enjoy your presence in my life more than just a partner at work and a classmate at school.  
It’s comprehensible that you’re not, experiencing the same situation, I’ve had the proven a few times, madame!   
But, like I mentioned. I just… had to let go of anything I held back.  
That’s it. I said it. Fortunately neither of us are meeting again, or at least I’ll be too unconscious to truly **meet**_ _you, therefore no awkward interactions, my cactussexual partner~!  
I… haven’t told my family about this. I’ll probably leave them a letter with an address in my house, and hope that you come pick it up and deliver it to the post.   
After all, the poor lads have done nothing wrong. It was only my foolishness that caused this… ‘distance’.  
I’m going to be resting in the central hospital of this city.  
To end this **fucked up**_ _letter on a cheesy routine, let me just state that I, by all means wish you the best.  
Hopefully you don’t get paired up with a smelly partner. Perhaps either one as cool as **the** Neil Watts, or one as, I guess, ‘business’ as ~~Bobert~~ Robert Lin.   
__Please, if I had a public funeral keep them from giving any dumb speeches. Go up there and start screaming out the main theme of Dragon Ball Z.  
So long, partner.  
_ _\- Dr. Neil Watts_

_My precious Neil,_

_It’s been so long since I’ve last grabbed a pen to write a letter. Usually I would’ve texted anyone or just give them a call._  
But you’re Neil Watts, gave me a request for a letter, and a letter you shall have.  
I visited you today. Truth to be told, you looked the most peaceful I’ve ever seen you. The atmosphere was quite, tranquil. It was as if you were free of all your struggles.   
The hibiscus I’ve planted next to your gravestone is growing rapidly. Surprisingly, of course, considering the weather condition our town’s in. Nevertheless, I’m glad that it gives off some radiance and color in the gray cemetery.   
I brought a few of your favorite things by the grave, even though they basically just are going to be there until some random guy sweeps them off the grave.   
Put some good old origamis on it. Hopefully you’ll enjoy them, however you may see them.  
And of course I’m obligated to reply to each and every one of your questions, huh?  
Traci and her family are doing okay. Jamie’s still a bit confused on how a person can die of **avoiding pain for such a long time** , and Traci’s always around, making sure I don’t break down or anything. Poor gal’s let go of her everyday life to look over me.  
My garden isn’t looking so good. I haven’t had the motivation to go and water my treasures. My eggplants are rotting, thank you very much. The cactus is surprisingly okay. If they can survive the desert how can they not survive a mental fracture?  
My new partner… his name is Marco. A new rookie. Pretty much a newbie, he doesn’t even know how to break a barrier. I kind of miss the sound of “Hadouken” or whatever it was, and he’s not helping by constantly being quiet, observing the atmosphere around him.  
Your office is still empty. Marco has moved in another office on the forth level. The badge “Dr. Neil Watts” is still on the door. No one, not even the boss has the heart to remove it yet. I still pass by it every day expecting the shadow of a water bucket, pfft!  
Roxanne and Robert, hah! You won’t believe that Robert finally asked her out. I mean, you did have a few guesses back then, but I’m pretty sure no one would’ve expected something to actually arise.  
Mind you, Robert is very upset about you being gone. I guess even he misses some of your stupid shenanigans.   
The rest of the office are…. Pretty much still in a haze. They’re trying their best not to fret over me with condolences and check-ups, and to be honest I appreciate it. I’d appreciate a few months of being alone until I feel… stronger.  
There are…a few frustrations I never got to tell you as well, Neil. Especially after reading the fifth letter of yours.  
I’ll start with the good things, unlike how you commenced.  
It’s too late to confess or come and face any sort of truth, but Neil Watts, I’ve loved you for a long time. Drastically I knew you felt the same, I just never found the courage within myself to share it with you. I was… so insistence on keeping my professional and personal life separate that I forgot you were living in the boundaries.   
It’s too late for anything now, and all I’m truly feeling is regret for the connection I’ve missed. But hah, what can I do about it? Rant about it in a letter to a dead person? … That’s exactly what I’m doing.  
I was, and still am very upset with how your story ended. It was partly my fault, or at least I count it as mine. I found the pills in the car, I don’t… I don’t know why I let you off the hook that easily. Maybe if I had only pressed a little bit more on the subject, you would’ve received your treatment… sooner, and I wouldn’t be wasting ink on this forsaken paper.  
I went through your computer. Nice game, totally an improvement from whatever the last one was supposed to be. I’m still surprised that how much of the mementoes and links you remembered.   
Thanks to the help of Roxanne, we fiddled a bit with your computer to translate your language back to something Rox could understand. It was… mesmerizing to say the least, what you had created. But dangerous, nonetheless.   
I was surprised that you had no wish other than for your machine to continue the development until it could reach a usable level. Nobel of you. It only caused more anger in my heart, huh.  
Truly, I don’t believe there’s anything left for either of us to mention.   
Of course, there’s a lot of pent-up emotions inside of me. A lot of regrets. A lot of things I can’t share with just anyone, not even with my sister. Perhaps I could’ve, with my best friend of almost 20 years, over a cup of coffee on our way home. But of course, you had to go ahead and leave, huh?  
Who knows? Maybe for the contract of my death, I would wish for my dead lover to come back to life.  
On an ending note, on a letter written to myself, Neil Watts…   
~~I love y~~  
I’m sorry.  
Wherever you are, I’m sure you’re at peace, perhaps stargazing with your grandfather.  
With love,  
Eva Rosalene. 


End file.
